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Untelligence Test

The following is an untelligence test - a simple test to ascertain exactly how untelligent (or, in laymans terms, "thick") you are. Answer the very, very difficult questions below, in about the same time it would take you to successfully open a pot of UHT milk without spilling the contents over your lap (as if that ever happens).

1. What number comes between 2 and 4?
(a) Yes.
(b) No.
(c) Yes and No.
(d) Three.

2. Who is the current Prime Minister of the United Kingdom (as of August, 2005)?
(a) Me.
(b) Tony Blair.
(c) Noel and Liam Gallagher.
(d) A dog.

3. Complete the following: Hat is to Head as Shoe is to...?
(a) Salmon.
(b) A small, yet significant proportion of the population of Mongolia.
(c) Foot.
(d) 0.000275%

4. What is the capital city of Mexico?
(a) Mexico City.
(b) Yoghurtiton
(c) 10 green bottles, hanging on the wall.
(d) The youth vote.

5. In which year did the Battle of Hastings take place?
(a) 1066.
(b) Bandar Seri Begawan.
(c) The Eighties Matchbox B-Line Disaster.
(d) Indigo.

6. Which of the following is the odd one out?
(a) Wolf.
(b) Bear.
(c) Weakly Interacting Massive Particles.
(d) Geese.

7. What commodities do Ferrari, Lambourghini and Porsche all sell?
(a) Killer whales.
(b) Oxford Circus.
(c) Buddhist monks.
(d) Cars.

8. What species of animal was Dumbo, the eponymous star of a famous Disney movie?
(a) Elephant.
(b) Page Up.
(c) Psychosis.
(d) World Wrestling Entertainment.

9. How much is that doggie in the window?
(a) £322,201,293.03.
(b) Ninety dollars.
(c) As this is a purely hypothetical question, it is in fact impossible to ascertain the precise price of the aforementioned "doggie". Furthermore, to give an answer that contained a price of some sort would, in fact, lead to the wrong answer, as the asker of the question could change his/her mind about how much the doggie costs after the reply has been cast to another, wholly different answer. In conclusion, there is no one answer that can be given, barring (naturally) this answer.
(d) Six groats.

10. Pick Option D:
(a) Option A
(b) Option B
(c) Option C
(d) Option D